What Does It Mean to Be Submissive? (Hint: It’s Not About Being Weak)

Let’s get one thing out of the way. Submissive does not mean weak. It does not mean you have no opinions, no power, or no voice. And it sure as hell doesn’t mean you just lay there and say, “Yes, Sir,” while someone else does all the work.

Being submissive is a choice. It is an active, deliberate, embodied act of surrender. And babe, when done well? It is one of the most powerful things you can do.

So let’s break it down—what does it actually mean to be a submissive?

Submission Isn’t About Giving Up Power. It’s About Redirecting It.

People often think submissives are passive or meek, but in reality, submissives are incredibly tuned in. They are managing their energy, their emotions, their body, their needs, and their dominant’s needs—all in real time. That is not weakness. That is presence.

Submission is about offering power, not losing it. You choose to serve, to obey, to respond, to open. And that choice, over and over again, creates magic.

You’re not submitting because you’re incapable. You’re submitting because you can.

Submission Looks Different for Everyone

Some submissives love rules, structure, rituals, and clear expectations. Others thrive in creative surrender, where each scene or exchange is a surprise. Some are brats, some are service-oriented, some are deeply sensual, and some are primal.

Your submission gets to reflect you.

If anyone’s ever told you that you’re too opinionated, too bossy, too sensitive, too anything to be a sub—congrats. You’re probably going to make an incredible one.

Want help figuring out your style of submission? Start with my free workshop, From Curious to Confident.

Submission Is Active, Not Passive

Good submission requires:

• Self-awareness

• Communication

• Emotional literacy

• Physical presence

• A sense of humor (yes, really)

It is about learning how to feel, listen, receive, trust, express, and take responsibility for your desires and your reactions.

You’re not a blank canvas. You’re a co-creator.

I talk about this constantly inside Empowered Submission Academy, where I teach submissives how to move from theory to embodied, delicious practice.

Being Submissive Doesn’t Mean You’ll Submit to Everyone

You don’t owe your submission to anyone who calls themselves a Dom. You get to be selective. You get to ask questions, negotiate terms, set boundaries, and say no.

In fact, the more connected you are to your submissive identity, the clearer your standards become. You start to recognize who you want to follow—and who isn’t worthy of your yes.

Submission is not a performance. It’s a relationship.

The Magic of Submission

At its best, submission is a portal. It’s the feeling of dropping into your body, softening your walls, and letting someone really see you. It’s about getting out of your own way, letting go of control, and being present with sensation, connection, and trust.

That kind of surrender? It’s addictive in the best way.

Whether you’re brand new or deep into your kink journey, your submission gets to evolve. It gets to have layers, flavors, moods, and edges. And it gets to be deeply, wildly yours.

Ready to Own It?

If your body is whispering yes but your brain is still negotiating, that’s totally normal. Submission lives in the body first. We just have to get out of the way long enough to hear it.

Start here:

• 🎓 Free Workshop – From Curious to Confident: The entry point for exploring your submissive identity

• 🔥 Empowered Submission Academy: The full A to Z for building confident, safe, spicy submission in real life

• 🎧 Surrender Series: My mini podcast-style audio series on submission, control, and letting go

You are not weak for wanting to be led.

You are powerful because you know how to choose it.

Let’s play.