Strap on: First Time

"What I truly loved about this product was extremely firm and silky silicone"

When I first started working with MedAmour, one of my main goals was to expand my sexuality and the ways that I can satisfy my partners. Primarily a heterosexual woman, I still have expanded my interest and sexual experiences with women. In harnessing these sexual relationships I have found that although it's very normal and common to include a strap-on for penetration in same-sex encounters with women, there is still a lot of stigma surrounding anal penetration with your male partners.


Broadening Sexual Horizons

When presented with the WFH Five Jules (Small) Dil and the SpareParts harness, I knew that I had a very easy opportunity to try this with one of my female partners, or have a partner try it on me. I felt that in order to expand my knowledge, my partner's pleasure, and my knowledge to my audience, it would be appropriate to try this product out on one of my male partners.


A few months ago I wrote a blog on how beneficial prostate massaging is for males. Having a very erogenous zones around the anal cavity, plus perhaps being called the male G-spot, it's almost a wonder that many men are not interested in exploring anal stimulation. This is mostly due to the social construct that any anal play may be associated with homosexuality.


Debunking this fallacy, it has been very eye-opening to finally have partners who are open to exploring this with me and educating me on their anatomy and pleasure. If anything I have felt that it is so empowering for my male partners to own their masculinity and be confident in their sexuality, acknowledging the anal play is a crucial and openly fun part of their sex life.

Embrace the Unknown

I won't lie, this is very new to me. Having had partners in the past who were not open to anal stimulation, this was definitely a little out there. Having my own harness? A dildo? Then trying that out on someone? You can understand that I was very very intimidated by this quest of mine. I am very fortunate that one of my male partners was more than happy to let me experiment with him and he could show me the ropes to enjoyable anal stimulation. Although I was nervous, I have never been the giver, or penetrator in sex- I have always been the person who receives penetration.


One of my very, very good friends has told me in regards to anal stimulation: the best givers are the ones who have received. I kept that in mind during this experience and I felt it was appropriate to have complete and open communication, ask questions, learn from my partner, and be able to have those funny moments. It was clear I didn't know what I was doing, but it was a learning experience so we were both ready to try (with many giggles of course).



The dildo is the smallest size that Medamour carries, and it is a great size to start off with in pegging. There are bigger sizes, which would also be sufficient for vaginal penetration. What I truly loved about this product was extremely firm and silky silicone, which also had a very slight bend. The harness from Spare Parts fit me like a glove and did not have room to slip. The last thing you need when trying to give someone pleasure is to not have a stable base, a true fear of mine. The dildo fit perfectly through the hole provided in the spare parts harness, and I felt the base of the dildo was very comfortable against my vulva. On the bottom of the harness, there is actually a pocket where you can insert a vibrator for yourself, which is extremely beneficial because then we can both experience pleasure at the same time.


Lubricant

Using a water based lube for this silicone toy, I prefer either using Sliquid or Pjur- keep in mind you will need multiple applications since water based lube absorbs. Before starting we made sure to engage in enough anal stimulation that my partner would be ready to have me penetrate him. This was done through a series of anal stimulation with my fingers, and then a light prostate massage before he guided me on how to gently start penetrating him. My partner was extremely supportive in telling me what feels good to him, appropriate rhythm, and then switching of positions. All throughout the experience, I took my time as we laughed and we made sure to just make a little bit of fun of the situation since it was my first time.

Through the experience my partner's best comment about the toy was how incredibly soft it was, along with its comfortable shape. He was also very impressed that the harness, although they look like boxer briefs, were able to hold up the dildo perfectly without any slippage or compromising the stability of it. This made it so our experience was seamless and easy. For aftercare, I gently rinsed off the dildo with Intimate Earth Green Tea Cleaner and then put it in my UVEE HomePlay Sanitizer.


New Ways to Connect

After our experience was over, we really found that we are able to connect on a whole different level. In this experience I did not feel like I sacrificed my femininity at all, if anything I felt like it was easier to have a very intense connection with my partner and be able to celebrate our sexuality, what makes us feel good. We were both very satisfied with the product, I as the giver and him as the receiver. We thought that this was the perfect combination of products to be able to experience new heights of pleasure and exploration together.